The first time I recognized him was at an art exhibition some time ago.I was fascinated by the appearance of a beautiful teenage woman.I can't look away from him when he dances.My friends and I finally called him "the most confident woman in the world."
It feels like he is bathing in a bathtub full of confidence every day.I know if I only have a portion of what he spends while on that stage, I will become unstoppable.
There is data to support it.Studies show that self-confidence correlates closely with success, and even more than competence.
That is why it feels like some of the people we most associate with success seem to have an abundance of coveted traits.
But the reality is, confidence is something we can develop and improve.Even better, science has shown us specifically how to do it.
In his book The Confidence Code, authors Katy Kay and Claire Shipman continue an extensive search to find out how people can increase their confidence.Here's how they summarize their findings:
"And fortunately, an important part of the trust code is what psychologists call the will: our choice.With diligent effort, we can all choose to expand our confidence.But we will get there if we stop trying to be perfect and start preparing to fail."
Take imperfect actions.Failed.Use what you learn to take action again.Repeat until you consistently get results that you can feel proud and confident.
Let's take a closer look at how to start applying this method:
1. Meet you with people who are confident.
In his best-selling book, Grit, Angela Duckworth explains that one way to develop grit, or any other trait you want, is to spend time with a group of people who do what you want to do or have expertise.You want to develop.
"The drive to adjust - to adjust to the group - is very strong indeed.Some of the most important psychological experiments in history have shown how fast, and usually without consciousness, the individual is in line with the group that acts or thinks differently."
So, if you are hard to believe in yourself, start socializing with people who are confident.You will not only begin to embody a mindset that helps them become successful, but you will begin to associate activities that allow them to get there too.
2. Take consistent action.
I have spent a lot of time studying successful entrepreneurs, players and leaders from various walks of life.And one of the key markers that drives their mastery, which gives them the confidence to perform at a high level, is to take action.Consistently.
They appear, day after day, again and again, to do work that will help them improve their skills.
Perpetrators who sell stadiums all over the world, pro-athletes who dominate their sports, entrepreneurs who seem to have a magic touch - all of them invest significant time in the trenches that take the necessary action to enable them to be so good that they cannot be ignored .
Belief comes from knowing you are able to complete the task to your level of satisfaction.You can't think that way.Intentional action (not just busyness) produces the knowledge you need.
There is nothing extraordinary in any of these actions;only the fact that they are carried out consistently and correctly, and together, produces excellence."
When excellence becomes your habit, confidence will become a natural by-product.And the only way to develop habits is to do the job repeatedly.
3. Dare to take risks
You cannot master without a series of failures that point you in the right direction to provide predictable high-quality results.
Of course, no one wants to fail.But if you want to succeed, that's exactly what you have to do more comfortably.
Failure leaves instructions on how to succeed.And success breeds confidence.
The more often you fail, the more knowledge you get about what works and what doesn't.The more insight you have about how to generate hits, the easier it will be for you to be sure that the path you are going through will bring you the results you want.The more progress you make, the smaller your confidence will be destroyed when something doesn't work as you wish.
Here's the story of some successful people:
Seth Godin is the best-selling author 18 times.Before he published one of his bestsellers, he spent 10 years packing books, producing books a month.Producing 120 books, many of which were sold very little, taught many things about how to deliver the work that the audience wanted to buy.
James Dyson spent 15 years producing more than 5,000 prototypes before he developed which launched his multibillion-dollar vacuum company.He wrote:
"There are difficult times, but every failure brings me closer to solving problems."
You can become more confident no matter your starting point.It all starts by recognizing that you can develop the competencies you need to be very good.And then, of course, you must take the necessary action that will help you get there.
Over time, as your skills increase, your confidence, the rhythm effects you have on people and your level of success.